Seeing in truth
Congratulations to this blog! I think it hit 500 posts with the last post, but then blogger seems to count all the unpublished drafts languishing in this blog too. :)
Have been making a lot of realisations about myself lately. I'm not sure whether this is a good or bad thing. I guess sometimes one makes realisations in the reverse: like wondering why is it most of my friends don't tend so much towards helpfulness on the enneagram test, or when I wonder why people like to drink or even contemplate getting drunk, or when I wonder why certain people say they would like outings but refuse to suggest ideas or get involved in planning. But I haven't really done the job of translating all these back to realisations about myself.
I guess it's really good to learn more about myself. On the other hand, the awareness of that these things are not normal, and that I am exceptionally (insert attribute) makes me realise that I don't always have to be this way. The above-mentioned attribute may not even be expected of me, as a normal decent human being. And this, in turn, might inspire thoughts of changing if I realise I have to suffer in certain ways for these attributes. So it makes the journey a little more difficult. It requires from me a little more tenacity, determination and willingness to sacrifice for my choices to act.
You see, before I would simply think of my way of life and ask, "How could anyone be any different?" I would believe, somewhat simply, that most people should be like me, yet I wouldn't question why I kept these deeply-held notions when everyone I met failed my standards of what a normal person should be.
But to realise these things is to allow me to know the world more truly. For example, one who loves others without realising their weak points, or who dismisses it by saying that someday they will get better if we just show them a little kindness, could be said to love that person in an incomplete way. The falsely optimistic person loves another in a way that rejects their true selves. This love is given by overlooking the real decisions that people have taken when becoming the people they are, overlooking the fact that the people you meet now define themselves by all these past choices. The not-fully-compassionate person only loves the other because he or she sees the other as promising more than they mean to, as better than they are now or than they may become. The love he or she gives is conditional upon a conviction and an imposed obligation that the other person will change.
So I would like to be a person who is able to face the task of seeing people as they really are, both good and bad, and what they were, and what they can be (on any one of their myriad paths). And I would like to be a person who could choose to love others, not thinking that they will necessarily change if I just try hard enough, but only - critically - hoping and wanting to nurture the other despite.
And so, bringing this back to my original topic, I would like to know that the choices I make are so worth it that they will be able to stand the test, despite fully realising the multitude of other ways I could choose to go. I would like my ideals to be based on truth, and thus be strengthened to the level to obtain the goodness of purity.
Have been making a lot of realisations about myself lately. I'm not sure whether this is a good or bad thing. I guess sometimes one makes realisations in the reverse: like wondering why is it most of my friends don't tend so much towards helpfulness on the enneagram test, or when I wonder why people like to drink or even contemplate getting drunk, or when I wonder why certain people say they would like outings but refuse to suggest ideas or get involved in planning. But I haven't really done the job of translating all these back to realisations about myself.
I guess it's really good to learn more about myself. On the other hand, the awareness of that these things are not normal, and that I am exceptionally (insert attribute) makes me realise that I don't always have to be this way. The above-mentioned attribute may not even be expected of me, as a normal decent human being. And this, in turn, might inspire thoughts of changing if I realise I have to suffer in certain ways for these attributes. So it makes the journey a little more difficult. It requires from me a little more tenacity, determination and willingness to sacrifice for my choices to act.
You see, before I would simply think of my way of life and ask, "How could anyone be any different?" I would believe, somewhat simply, that most people should be like me, yet I wouldn't question why I kept these deeply-held notions when everyone I met failed my standards of what a normal person should be.
But to realise these things is to allow me to know the world more truly. For example, one who loves others without realising their weak points, or who dismisses it by saying that someday they will get better if we just show them a little kindness, could be said to love that person in an incomplete way. The falsely optimistic person loves another in a way that rejects their true selves. This love is given by overlooking the real decisions that people have taken when becoming the people they are, overlooking the fact that the people you meet now define themselves by all these past choices. The not-fully-compassionate person only loves the other because he or she sees the other as promising more than they mean to, as better than they are now or than they may become. The love he or she gives is conditional upon a conviction and an imposed obligation that the other person will change.
So I would like to be a person who is able to face the task of seeing people as they really are, both good and bad, and what they were, and what they can be (on any one of their myriad paths). And I would like to be a person who could choose to love others, not thinking that they will necessarily change if I just try hard enough, but only - critically - hoping and wanting to nurture the other despite.
And so, bringing this back to my original topic, I would like to know that the choices I make are so worth it that they will be able to stand the test, despite fully realising the multitude of other ways I could choose to go. I would like my ideals to be based on truth, and thus be strengthened to the level to obtain the goodness of purity.
Labels: plans
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